Saturday, August 29, 2009

Until the Night

I'm feeling a little out of sorts today. I think it's the culmination of a few things.
For the past two weeks, I have been doing two jobs at the same time. I have been doing my regular sales role and I have also been covering for someone who is currently on long service leave.
The great thing is that I just love being busy and I thrive on it. The challenge of juggling various tasks actually gives me a bit of a buzz.
On the other hand, it has been rather exhausting and I have been very lethargic in the evenings.
The physicality of running between point A and point B has enabled me to keep my mind off other things which have been going on. Certain issues I am having have been filed away in a deep dark recess of my mind.

Last night when I got home, I kind of collapsed a bit. The two week frenzy came to a close and as my body began to ache with the delayed reaction of a hectic fortnight and the filing cabinet in my brain I had attempted to keep shut sprang open and I had
issues strewn all over the place in a most confusing manner.

Today, some of the emotional impact that I have been avoiding has struck me like a gale force wind and I have been driven askew. All at once, I am experiencing confusion, hurt, sadness and anger all at the same time. I thought I was a little stronger than this, but apparently, this isn't the case.

I am going out this evening to see my very good friend Michelle who will cheer me up with nice food, entertainment and superb company. Sometimes we have to wade through the pensive day to reach the release of the night. It is at times like this I was not keeping myself alcohol free as I feel a little nip of something might loosen my tension a little.

I apologise for this post being a little glum (and somewhat vague), but there are times when I just need to express myself (and yet remain cryptic).

Saturday, August 22, 2009


This weekend marks the tenth anniversary of my arrival in Australia. Looking back to that time, I still find it incredible that I managed to get organised and financed in such a short space of time. It's all a bit of a blur to be honest. The decision was made, I got a credit card, applied for a visa, had a few issues with the passport (it turned up the DAY of the flight out - no kidding!) and all of a sudden, I was on a plane to Australia.

Prior to this massive upheaval in my life, I was working as an Assistant Manager of the wonderful Legend Cafe/Bar in Bournemouth on the south coast of England. I had been studying Screenwriting for Film and Television at the university and although my life wasn't exactly as I had once expected it to be (I certainly wasn't a television personality or film star as I had once hoped) I was reasonably happy with my lot.

Then, wham-bam, I was in Australia seeking employment. I had a handful of jobs before I settled down in the world of Penguin Books including working for Blockbuster Video, Angus & Robertson Bookworld and selling tickets for comedy shows in the street. The latter job was a tad painful, mainly because they made me shift a filing cabinet in the office and it fell on my hand and broke my little finger.

During my time in Australia, I have experienced some amusing things;

1. Being a door-greeter at Myer's Department Store where, in my naivety of the Australian colloquialism for 'linen' replied to the question "Can you tell me where Manchester is?" I replied "It's in the North of England!"

2. Australia is obsessed with big landmarks. The Big Banana, the Big Marino, the Big Pineapple, the Big Shrimp etc.
I am just waiting for KFC to erect the Big Cock.

3. Some country folk are a little peculiar. One of my clients to whom I was trying to sell Paul Davies' popular Science book How to Build a Time Machine, and she asked "Won't that encourage children to build bombs and go back in time?"

I do enjoy my life in Australia and I have made some superb friends whom I wouldn't exchange for anything (except, perhaps, a working TARDIS - sorry guys, but really... this is me we're talking about.) and they have all been so wonderfully supportive when I have been down or in trouble and been there by my side for the funnier and more bizarre times.

I do miss the UK a lot. The countryside, the greasy spoon cafes, the BBC... and I think if I won the lottery, I would move back, as long as I didn't have to work or eat Asda pasta ever again.

However, I am settled here now with my partner in crime, Fizzgig, whom I adore unconditionally.

Who knows what the next ten years will hold or where I will be in that time. All I know at this very moment is that, despite a few ups and downs, I wouldn't change a great deal. Maybe I wouldn't have had that night on the town where I was so off my face that I vocally berated a bunch of talentless drag queens before being dragged out of the pub by my elbow, but we all have our little indiscretions.

Friday, August 14, 2009


Goodness, gracious! It has been a couple of weeks since I last posted something in this bog, so I feel I ought to write something again. It is Friday evening and I have no plans. I am in an odd sort of mood and cannot decide upon doing anything, so I am doing silly things like playing on the internet and taking photos of myself out of sheer boredom. Sure, I could read or watch a DVD or something, but for some reason, I am just not in that sort of mood.

My friend Lisa came down from Queensland to visit and she has spent the last couple of days with me. We ate out a lot, walked around the city (we walked for about ten kilometres - probably more. Poor Lisa wasn't wearing the correct sort of footwear - ie 'Women's shoes' - and ended up with very sore feet. Whoops.
However, while we were out wandering through the abysmal non-food segment of Victoria Market (utter poo, let me tell you - all cheap rip-offs with sewn-in labels and tacky crap that only fools would buy!) and we kept bumping into some policemen. One of whom was very cute and I struck up a conversation with him hopefully persuading him that I was not stalking him. Lisa aided the conversation and we got into quite a discussion about legalities, jaywalking and sci-fi on DVD.

This rather handsome cop requested my details. He withdrew his little brown book and took my name - I gave him my card too so he could get my number. Now, is it normal for policemen to do this?

Well, tonight, after Lisa had gone on her way, I began getting text messages from an unknown number. I texted back and forth, unsure of whether it was this very copper. I am cautious at times like these and a little cynical. I wasn't convinced about who it was. I asked and they told me to guess. After a few flirty text messages back and forth, I put a theory to the test. I asked what his initials were - no response.

So, I think it was this - due to a post on facebook stating that I had given a policeman my number, someone thought it would be hilarious to pretend to be this tall, handsome long-arm-of-the-law and proceeded to play with my mind (and heart) by leading me on. However, not knowing the initials of the man lead me to conclude that this was the truth as everybody should know their own initials and I knew what the policeman's initials were having clocked the badge on his chest.
So, whoever it was trying to fuck with me, failed.

This just exacerbates my loathing of the human race. Some people are just plain evil and it depresses me that people would think it is fun to play with someone's emotions in such a way.
It must be someone who has my number and supposedly a friend. Who can say?

OK, I don't like to whinge too often as it just makes a very boring post to read. But I had to say something...